Gift horses

It might be time to rethink that old proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth". Or that seems to be the theme of today's Odd News.

So here, for your entertainment and edification, are three reasons why you might just want to have a look at that horse mouth after all.

#1. Because if you don't, it might bite you. Floridian police use stimulus money as a lure to catch criminals. They say it's a lot safer to draw the criminals to them rather than go after them in their homes.

#2. Because it might be a Trojan horse. Several state governors received unexpected laptops they didn't actually order. After the first shipment, they suspected a mistake. After the second, they called in law enforcement. None of the laptops were ever actually turned on. Turns out they were ordered with bogus accounts. It will be interesting to find out what kind of Greeks were hiding in there.

#3. It might not even be a horse at all. Dutch officials are dismayed to discover their treasured moon rock is just a piece of petrified wood. So did the US ambassador know it was a scam when he gave the "moon rock" to the Dutch prime minister? Looks like somebody is going to have to pull out all their diplomatic skills to explain this one.

What librarians REALLY do at conventions

Everything you didn't want to know about library conventions and refused to ask. But I'm telling you anyway. Or rather, showing you, because I don't expect you to take my word for it.



Hat tip to the Bookninja via Moonrat.

Question: where did they rehearse?

Too funny

When was the last time a TV commercial made you howl with laughter? This one did it for me. Which might say disturbing things about me.

Fun mob in Antwerp

I had a very odd emotional reaction to this video that I really didn't expect. Tell me how it affects you.

Frank Zappa's moustache

OK, so I don't feel like tackling anything heavy today. Enjoy.

The most creative, zaniest thing I have seen in a very long time

Who knew extreme shepherding could be so very funny?



Hat tip to Creative Madness.


Technorati tags: Extreme shepherding, LED sheep, Fun

I may not be Jesus

Just because it tickles my funny bone.



Technorati tags: LOLdogs, Good shepherd

I never would have thought of this on my own

but it's so true.

KFC’s Colonel Sanders Logo Totally Looks Like Environmental Activist David Suzuki



In case you're not Canadian, David Suzuki is a virtual institution in Canada. He's been hosting TV shows longer than most of us can remember. And the resemblance is such a delightful irony.


Technorati tags: David Suzuki, Colonel Sanders

There's gold in them thar, um, well, you know

The prefecture of Nagano, Japan, expects to make about 15 million yen this year mining gold. From sewage. Their incinerated sludge has a higher gold content than Japan's leading gold mine.

So next time you find yourself neck-deep in doo-doo, remember to look for the golden lining.


Technorati tags: Gold, Sewage

This is just too much fun

Some enterprising blogger pokes fun at advertising. ADmonishments will probably never lack for material. I think I will be making regular visits to this one.

Here's a recent offering.



Because nothing says clean like KKK.

Check it out.

Thanks to the author of The Superfast Reader for pointing me in that direction.


Technorati tags: Advertising

13 signs that you might be left wing

I stole this from the MySpace blog of a young man I know. It was meant as a joke, but it's almost too true to be funny. At least he is an equal-opportunity offender. Enjoy.

13 SIGNS THAT YOU MIGHT BE LEFT WING:

1. You believe that "having an open mind" means being pro-gay.
2. You believe the 9/11 attacks were entirely planned and staged by the Republican Party in order to justify an attack on Islam, and to get oil.
3. You think that eating meat is murder, but abortion is progress.
4. You think that 1 white person and 20 black people is diversity.
5. You think that all society's problems can be solved by throwing money at it, and at the same time, you believe that money is the cause of all society's problems.
6. You think that religion is the cause of all wars.
7. You believe that anyone who votes Republican (or Conservative) is a corrupt, close-minded, bigoted fascist.
8. You believe that the only real terrorists are American businessmen.
9. You believe that the official news story is bull crap, but the ramblings of a random anonymous blogger are absolute truth.
10. All your opinions come from Michael Moore, Bill Maher, and Al Franken.
11. You think breaking windows and flipping cars is a form of peaceful protest.
12. You believe that the Bible is hate literature.
13. Your mind is made up before you've heard the issue.


13 SIGNS THAT YOU MIGHT BE RIGHT WING:

1. You believe that if you know one gay person, you have an open mind.
2. You believe that the 9/11 attacks were planned and supported by the entire Muslim world, because they all hate the freedom of sweet, innocent, flawless America.
3. You think that abortion is murder, but war is freedom.
4. You think that 20 white people, and 1 person who may have had a distant non-white ancestor is diversity.
5. You think that all society's problems can be solved as long as there is another country that can be blamed and invaded.
6. You think that all of society's problems are caused by immigrants.
7. You believe that anyone who votes Democrat is a tree-hugging, freedom-hating, terrorist-loving, communist that hates Jesus.
8. You believe that Jesus would vote Republican.
9. You believe that all terrorists are Muslim.
10. You think that universal health care is a form of communism.
11. All your opinions come from Rush Limbaugh, Bill O'Reilly, and Ann Coulter.
12. You think that the 9/11 attacks and Iraq are related.
13. Your mind is made up before you've heard the issue.

SIGNS THAT YOU ARE AN IDIOT:
1. If anything on either one of these lists applies to you.


Technorati tags: Left wing, Right wing

The ultimate in political rants

Edward Willett, who is both an American and a Canadian, who moves in circles who insist on rotating in opposite directions, has penned a political rant for the current elections that is bound to please everybody, as well as tickling their funny bones. Click on over and take a look.

For all you Pentecostals out there

I couldn't resist.



Courtesy of I Can Haz Cheeseburger.

Technorati tags: lolcats

I Can Has Cheezburger

This blog has become a daily stop for me. And it's too good not to pass on. I Can Has Cheezburger is a cooperative blog that allows readers to submit captioned pictures in the LOLCats tradition. Other animals or amusing pictures are accepted; the current front page has a lioness, a polar bear and a raccoon, in addition to the numerous pussycats. Several pictures are posted daily.



It's like the comics page in the newspaper, but often better.

Technorati tags: LOLCats

Toking up with Lawrence Welk

This clip should come with a beverage alert. Make sure you swallow your coffee before you view it, because you're going to be either spluttering in indignation or howling with laughter.



I led a fortunate childhood. My parents didn't watch Lawrence Welk and I was subjected to him only when I happened to be at my grandmother's house at the wrong time. I much preferred Hymn Sing, trust me. There the content mattered. On the Lawrence Welk Show, content was meaningless and this clip proves it beyond a shadow of a doubt.

But it does leave me wondering: who set him up? There is no way all the young performers on that show were ignorant of the song's real meaning. This was perhaps a bit of a sly wink to all the teenagers who were more or less forced to watch the show.

Hat tip to Tully of Stubborn Facts

Technorati tags: Lawrence Welk

I have got to dye my hair

I don't really want to. Having grey hair really doesn't bother me. Besides, it's such a messy bother to dye your hair at home, and so expensive to do in a beauty salon, but I have been pushed beyond what any reasonable person can be expected to bear.

It's the young people. I blame them. The arrogance of them! I see it in their eyes - they have relegated me to little old lady status. Quite without my permission.

I see it in their outstretched arms, as I clamber over the snowbanks on the sides of the road after last night's storm. The roads - thank goodness and city services - are pretty much clear, but it will be a matter of days before the high ridges lining the roads are carted away to their final resting place.

In the meanwhile, pedestrians and bus riders must perforce be mountain climbers. And all these well-raised young people extend their arms to me, concerned about the poor old bones beneath the hoary head. This, despite the fact that my face is unlined and my bones are entirely up to the challenge of snowbank clambering. So I smile, protest vainly, and take the proffered arms. You have to reward that kind of consideration, no matter how galling.

I have to dye my hair, before I snap at the next solicitous youngster who offers me her seat. What happened to all the churlish young louts I keep hearing about? One can only dream...


Technorati tags: Hair dye, Today's youth, Grumbling

Thanksgiving memories

Seeing as so many of my American friends are blogging about Thanksgiving, I figured I didn't have to be deprived just because I'm Canadian.

I'm thinking back too many years to my first Thanksgiving after I left home. My roommate was out of town, so I decided that I - yes I - would host the family's Thanksgiving dinner. Seeing as the "family" in town was reduced to my grandmother and one aunt/uncle couple, this wasn't too intimidating a task. Except that I was 18 and making Thanksgiving turkey for my grandmother!

My kitchen was smaller than most walk-in closets nowadays, but I nonetheless produced the traditional feast, roast turkey with home-made stuffing and gravy being the requisite centrepiece. It got quiet during meal-time, always a good sign, and then my grandmother leaned back, heaved a great sigh of contentment, and pronounced her verdict.

"NOW you can get married."

Grandma's long gone, but she still makes me smile after all these years with that crack. Most especially because she wasn't trying to be funny.

Technorati tags: Thanksgiving, Turkey, Grandmothers

Poor King Tut

First they take his skull and put it on public display. And then, to add insult to injury, Steve Martin cashes in on the event. OK, so maybe I have my chronology scrambled. Sue me. But Martin's hoary old favourite has found new relevancy with today's news. And it's still funny.



Technorati tags: King Tut, Steve Martin, SNL

What a hoot!

After checking out Ed Willett's blog and discovering that the white, American-Canadian, male science fiction writer took a Star Trek character test and came out as Uhura (!!!), I just had to take it myself.

Well, as far as psychological insight goes, this test is dead in the water, but it's a winner for entertainment value. When I saw my results, I just about fell off my chair laughing. For I am - wait for it...

Your results:

You are Will Riker



At times you are self-centered but you have many friends. You love many women, but the right woman could get you to settle down.

Will Riker - 60%
Geordi LaForge - 50%
Beverly Crusher - 50%
Deanna Troi - 50%
Uhura - 45%
James T. Kirk (Captain) - 45%
Data - 42%
Jean-Luc Picard - 40%
An Expendable Character (Redshirt) - 40%
Chekov - 35%
Spock - 34%
Mr. Scott - 30%
Mr. Sulu - 20%
Worf - 15%
Leonard McCoy (Bones) - 15%

Click here to take the Star Trek Personality Quiz


I must have some serious self-hatred thing going on, because Will Riker comes in second on my list of Star Trek characters I love to hate. I don't dare name the #1, because hard-core Trekkies would firebomb my house.

When I look at the darn thing again, I discover that of the top six in the list, four are characters I have a hard time liking... Yup, gotta be self-hatred. I mean, how could one possibly question the validity of an online quiz?

Technorati tags: Will Riker, Star Trek, Edward Willett

Good news chronicles, Oct. 19

Spending too much time thinking about politicians, world leaders, and various international problems can get depressing.

So here is my good news antidote.

A Jewish youth organization in Israel, the Kavod Foundation, feeds needy Muslims at Eid, Christians at Christmas and Jews at Rosh Hashanah and Sukkot. They work all year round to provide food at religious holidays. Hat tip to City of Brass.


Kazakhstan discovers a sense of humour and invites Borat to come see the real Kazakhstan.

Rakhat Aliyev said in an interview with Kazakhstan Today that while he understands the anger he thinks the country "must have a sense of humor and respect other people's freedom of creativity."

"I'd like to invite Cohen here," he said. "He can discover a lot of things. Women drive cars, wine is made of grapes and Jews are free to go to synagogues."

Got good news you want to tell the world about? Email it to me at thewalrussaid(at)gmail(dot)com.

Technorati tags: Kavod Foundation, Borat